You just think too much :)

Maybe
you just think too much
while others don't treat you like how you treat 'em

back from futsal
but don't really dare to give 'em response
I just need some place to release my stress
really.
so I chose to write it here.

Months had passed, Days had passed
I treat her as future wife
as someone told me,
treat the one you loved and imagine she's your future wife
but not simply fall in love
I admit that I'd fall in too deep now
I can't even get up
and I thought she might treat me the same
and feel the same
until tonight :)
she explained that,
she just treat me like a friend and a sister.
ask me not to misunderstand
means that there maybe still a slot for her to get a boy?
or maybe the excuse for her to get rid of me?
this is what i just guessing.
of course I don't hope this is real.
Definitely.
I had give out everything
really everything.
but what I get is just she treats me like a brother
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA!
Is that worth for all?
I don't know
I don't know why she wants to speak in that way.
I just can't accept it at all
and that makes me don't dare to reply her
I don't wanna know more
I don't wanna ask
I just want to make her feel like I never saw the message before
She will never know how hurts I feel
Like you love her with all your heart, but she just simply tell you, she treat you like a brother? :)
I simply totally can't accept that.

Maybe this is the God's test?
God plans everything has its purpose
so maybe I shouldn't put it in my heart.

Now, please
Godfather and Lord Jesus
I need you :)
Do make me feel joyful in You
I really feel so empty
I shouldn't just affected by her words.
Lord, pull me up if I get too deep
I need you to lead this relationship and make me a decision
In Lord Jesus' name
Amen

Future

Mid-term exam had passed
and I achieved a real bad results this time
worse than before
and I'm not improving while all others all trying hard to improve
as to get in better classes next year
so I think to do something
to boast up my studies
and change all my study styles
change my attitudes
I really think much for this 1 month time
from the holidays until now.

My parents do everything to give me a good future
get everything I want
buy me everything I asked for
but I can't do something worth to repay them
first I really felt that I'm a terrible son
not really know how to appreciate their love
and never respect them
always know to talk them loudly
using some words that I shouldn't be using for them ><
I really feel so sorry to them after all
I should've changed myself
in order to get all success
my relationship to my parents
my relationship with my friends
my relationship with Her
my relationship with God
and I have to suffer sometimes really hard
before achieving what I really wants to

I don't wanna give you empty promises anymore
I am always doing the childish way
and causing laughter around
like a fool
I really wanted to stop this stupid habits.
but I just can't get any feelings of secure for me
I have to do this to make myself feel better
so don't scold me if I'm childish sometimes
you know what?
I forced to =(
I will feel very lonely at night
although with your accompanion
only my hands are busy
to text
but not my mouth ><
I want to talk
to share my feelings at night
but I can't
there's no one.
maybe I should choose my parents
but they too have their job
their duties to be done
so I can just keep myself silent through the night
and just phone you sometimes and talk
to make me feel a little bit better
and to make my night stay great =)
I know I can't give any promises now
but I just hope that you really know my feelings
my feelings towards you
towards my studies
towards my future
I did really think about it seriously
but I just felt so lazy to work it out before
but now
I'd really decided to change my own life
to give you and me, everyone beside me a better future
I will do prayer every night
talk to God
ask God to be with us always =)
Count our blessings
God bless everyone

Sorry
if I did wrong to you guys last time
I will try hard to get back our friendship
and I really hope that we will lasts long
friendship forever =)
our relationship never ends

and too for You
I will work hard to maintain this relationship
till the worlds' end =)
Me and You
I meant it
I love you
you're my source of power sometimes
boast me up when I'm down
telling something to comfort me
be with me when I'd hated by others
you're the one I trust the most
you're the one I fighting for
=)
and tomorrow is our 10th monthsary
hoped that we can achieve and maintain our relationship together
no matter where we are
what we are doing
we will be working hard together
just for our future

=)
Last but not least
I still never do any promises now
cause I know
I never need those promises to make a lie for me myself
I just wanna work it out
let everyone sees it =)
know what I'm doing
God bless me

From the inside out -- Hillsong United =)

For the first time.

Today
when I reach home
my dad hand me my L license card!!
but the picture is so so different from the real me.
ewww ~ =O
I really so happy when first get the license card
means that I'm nearly to freedom
and can go wherever I want =)
do whatever I wish
siao meh -,- hahahaha!
just that I can have my own transport rather than always depends on my parent to fetch me.

1-7-2011
is not today
but it falls own the day after
means tomorrow!!
and it's quite a memorable day for US =)
know what?
we had been in a relationship for 300 days !
hiak hiak hiak!!
not 3 not 30
it's 300 !!
owhh yaaaa
then I have my plan to give Her a surprise
by buying her a cake from SR. =)
and and
I have my own transport now
although it's quite a dangerous task for me to ride there
as I'm a new L license holder.
but this is just my only plan.
so I planned to ride out at around 4.xx
cause my parent would not be around that time

before that,
I was sleeping on the sofa
then She wakes me up at 16:20
and ask me to wake up
first, I was kinda lazy to do so
but I have to
so that I can work my plan out! =D
then she ask me to get my homework done =)

everything starts
after the call is ended
She never know what happens tomorrow which I had reminded Her time and time
and She never know I'm going out by motor ><
then I rush to the bathroom and take a short bath
then I change my shirt on
and started to pick up the bike's key
and go out =)
----- riding along the road -----
----- reaching SR -----

Sir, can I have a piece of Chocolate Cheese Beries?
Eat here or takeaway?
Takeaway :)
Alright!

=== Conversation Ends ===
then I get back to my motor
and ride back =)
soon I reach home
and put it in my fridge safely xD

hahahahahahahhaa.
for the first time!!
I go out without informing Her
went out 16:30 and reached home at 16:59 =)
Thanks God
I reach home safely.
hope that she will enjoy tomorrow =)

For what I do, I do it for you. <3
with no regrets.
I love you =)

Nights

what is night?
According to Wikipedia,
night is the period of time when the sun is below the horizon.
every time the sun rises, will then sunsets
and here's come the night

i had passed my mid-term exam
which lasts for almost 2 weeks
through the 2 weeks
I didn't sleep well
I didn't eat well
just to get myself concentrate on my studies
and I don't want to feel regret after all
and I went for group studies with her for times
in crc, school library and Starbucks sometimes

every night
I will feel something wrong
really
just a kind of feelings
feeling stressed
will then easily gone mad
and so
it affects my mood much
and I tried hard to control it
it just couldn't works
I don't know why I will have such feelings only
at the night
I hate it!
it makes me feel bad
it makes me feel so stressed during exam
and now
it struggles me again and again
it makes me think for something more
then i will gone mad
and started to have my mood changed

sorry if I treated you bad these days
hope you can understand my feelings
and don't think that I'm leaving you or what
just the feelings lead my mind to a Devil's part
and I suffered for quite a period
I know I have my mood changed
but I just hope that I can text you or chat with you with the way I really am
and not just pretending that I'm fine
and so
I will become so called 'don't trust you' at night
it struggles me for months
Months.

and
I really hope that you can tell me everything
you promised me
before
again and again
but it seems only words
for you
maybe you're nothing to get informed late
but for me,
i really don't like
I thought I told you times before
and it makes me no secure
you can say that I just think too much
but I just wanna tell you that
I don't want to let any chances to come across to separate us apart

I am really not in the mood now
I hope that you will understand my feelings.
and too for my readers
if you know what causing me suffering these stupid stuffs
do tell me ><
I really need help
before I can't stand with it
I just wanna say sorry to you
many things happened these days
you never noticed that something had changed
never
sometimes the guy who are so strong from his physical
he is no longer a strong guy in mental
you have to take good care of them
especially
to someone who really meant so much to you

Godfather
do bless my every night
God bless me.
=)

Lastly,
I still wanna say
I love you =)

Music of my day
What can I do - The Corrs

Dream =)

First of all,
I get my addmaths for 70 !! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Great news huh !! for the very first time
and she get 68 =)
yay yay ! xp

Secondly as Lastly, =)
Waking up early in the morning
wash up myself =)
and have my breakfast.
In a really good mood today.
hahahahahahaha
Cause imma for a outing trip to Penang with Her,Sis Reb and Tengwai =D
huhu.
It really just like a dream. =)

About 1130
I reach Her house
I felt really nervous
Cause have to meet with Her mum for the very first time after being IAR
haha
after putting my bag
then going to greet Her mum right =D
then walk there
and say: Auntie =)
aunt : hello =D
haha
cute cute.
feel so so friendly suddenly =)
then help Her to do Her lisan homework
Good BF huh =D
haha. *ss-nya~*
Her mum came in and chat with me for a while
and say that Im so slim ><
OMG =

then Her sister and Tengwai reached and fetch us
as Her sister went for working =)
then going to Penang at 1.xx
and reach at 3.xx p.m
then go to Pikom PC fair
then go to Gurney to have our tea break =)
as all are quite hungry that time xD
a piece of BIG FRIED CHICKEN
then share share eat lo =)
then go for PDI
and bought a Couple shirt =P
nice =)
then meet with Her brother and her brother's gf =D
and chit chatting around.
make me feel like we're just a family =X
gila d la me. Perasan nya~ =D
then go for dinner.
chit chatting there until 9.xx
then going back to hometown =)
she laid her body towards my shoulder
and slept silently
like a baby =)
I love that feel. Really =)
muackss =P

okay okay la.
eyes pain pain d
rest a while first.
I love you
I enjoy the trip really much !! =)
you make my day a memorable one xp
== 12/3/2011 ==
and thanks to Her sister and Her bf =D
God bless Us =)

God. =(

If you are here right now
I got something to tell you.
Really.

I need God. =(
God, please bless me.
God, please forgive me.
God, please give me a better day
God, I need you !

You may not forgive me.

Sacrifice before you Love =)

Exam is just around the corne
and I guess that this is the really first day I didn't text with you =(
Cause you're going to prepare yourself for the exam
Well-well-well than ever before =)
I should feel happy to you
and supports you always
but I just can't get my study mood for the coming exam
as I can't put down something in my hearts
and also in my mind
God bless me

Today
went for a seminar
with Her and of course others la
then while having group photos that time
I just had a bad feelings
Seeing her standing beside a other guy
I really feel so bad =(
I feel that I'm just so stupid
Why don't I just ask her to stand with me ><
WHY ?! WHY ?!?!?! WHY ?!?!?!?!?!?!?
feel like knocking my head to the Great Wall of China =(

and going for a Penang Trip
which is held by our school's club
=)
with Her
haha xD
happy happy.
first outing to a 'FAR' place
hope that WE will enjoy the trip much
and cherish that moment we are playing together =)
and give Her a unforgettable memories.
I love you
I mean it. =)
I will sacrifice everything for you <3

Songs playing: One in a million - Ne Yo
There's a million girls around but I don't see no one but you =)
Girl you're so one in a million
You are
Baby you're the best I ever had
Best I ever had =)
I Love YOU

The First Time =) =(

the very first time
you never do it to me.
before.

you break your promise for the very first time
and
didn't listen to my advice
and you think that it's a joke
but it is not.
I want you to do so
it's for your own good.

and the exam is coming soon
I have totally no mood
or just to say
not in a good mood
to study. =
God Bless Me please. ><

A guy jealous when he really is. =)

10.55 p.m

=( My First Time

Today
I was accompanying Her after school for her duty
We then did some homeworks
and
she saw a Cookies and Cake's book
and says that she wants to try them so badly
then I bear her words in mind
and after a moment,
we then go back to home =)

When first I reach home,
straight I ask my mum to buy me those ingredients
to bake my first Basic-Butter-CAKE for her . =)
I was so excited when first I prepared the steps
and follow it totally
cause I scared that I might disappoint Her

then
after finished all those preparations
Put-ed it in the Oven
sets for 45 minutes.
then I started to waiting for my first Cake to success =)

time passes
seconds ~

minutes ~

and suddenly
the aunty who just live beside my house
shout my mum
and says that some bad smell came from our house ><><><><><
I just take the first time as my punishment.
and have to becareful with it next time =

=DD

YAY !!

Happy
Fifth
Month
Anniversary
xDD

dont jealous =)
we deserved so
and we will go through every
Valentine's Day
and
Chinese New Year
and
Merry Christmas
hahahahaha =D

=|

We

Are

Not

Couple

In

Facebook.

I'm Happy yet I'm Sad . =/

hmmmm.
studied for 1 week time.
erm.
something happens
and really hurts me much.
but i still have to face it strong =)

yeaa.
I'm studying in 4Sc2 this year
and FIRST she is same class with me ><
again Daryl sitting beside me.
fooling around for the first and second day xD
talking jokes. playing.
but just like left out something >.<
really miss 3A2 last year.
the whole class playing around.
haha.

and soo.
tired everyday la.
as wake up every morning at 6 o.O
then have more homeworks.
Physics
Biology
Chemistry
BM
BC
BI
Maths
AddMaths
Sejarah
P.Moral
really feel like dying.

owh yaaaa.
i'd stated something happens right ?
yea.
and it's a sad news for me
without any notice
on the Assembly second week
the teacher ask us ( form 4 ) to leave at the assembly field
and then some students are procured to study in 4Sc1 from 4Sc2
and one of them is Her.

H
E
R. =(

i really felt so shocked when first i heard it.
and Joshua started to 'suan siao' me with saying :
' yay ! Yewei is ours d '
>< how sad how jealous when first i heard his words
but still I as a guy have to pretend like nothing =')
then walk into class
sit there kept talking to Daryl
and dont know why
just dont dare to look at Her at that moment. ><
sighhhhh
maybe just the news come in a sudden
and i cant get in such situation yet =X
and C r i e d .
but sure she dont see it la. =)
sooo.
dayss after.
will be better sooner and sooner xP
dont worry about me.
haha

then went for football just now
accidentally hurts my finger
when catching the ball
then cant be keeper d
go for shooting. mana tau ><
hurts my leg again
argh ! damn !
hope that you will see this post when i'm recover =P
blekkkkk.

so
as conclusion
kinda happy =)
cause i can still see her
every morning
every recess time
every dismiss time
and Thursday duty time xD
huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu.
i'm the luckiest guy in the world !! xDDDDDDD

currently listening to :
Fireworks - Katy Perry
Cause baby you're a firework ! =D
Hitz.fm drive thru with Natalie =)

New Year. New Life. New Dreams. New ME =)

yiiiiiiii hawwwwww xD
a new year has just arrived
year 2011
i have many wishes,
many dreams,
many works
done by this year =)

first of all,
this is the very first time
i had my countdown in FGA Taiping
invited by Leann
but she can't back in time. >.<
huhu
but yet it's still fun with the accompanion by Joshua Peh
many performances =)
and i feel that all guys and girls are friendly there.
SMILE with me although they dont know me xD
haha.
and she is the first to wish me New Year
blekkkkk <3

and so so
quite many things to done by this year
ermmmmmmmm
- APC
- Studies
- Football Team
- Athlete Team
- HandBall Team

what i wished for year 2011 are =)
- Adidas Futsal Shoe
- improve my studies
- and something 'bout love xDDD

hohohohohohohoho =P
xoxo

currently listening to -
Hitz.fm
Rick Dees and the Weekly Top 40 xDDD